I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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