11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
