His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
