i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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