I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
