It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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