Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize
