the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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