We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
