There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I look better un-naked...
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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