it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize