OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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