So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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