Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
