He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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