He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
he thought i was a dude.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
