Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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