Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
