have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
