Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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