Im at strip club and am horny
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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