your thong is hanging out like whoa
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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