I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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