smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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