Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
