More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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