love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Come see our sink grown plant.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
