He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
he thought i was a dude.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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