my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize