May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
