I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
