i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
