he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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