I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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