We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
