actually, I'm a sock model
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
