Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
