I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
