the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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