It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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