Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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