I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
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