ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
