I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
