You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Randomize
