Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
