margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize