i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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