If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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