I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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