Where is the hickey?
love makes seman taste better
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
